I think this is what they mean when they say “Big in Japan”. Everyone loves Mizuki Horii so no apologies for the lack of nipples.

How to sell a chair on Craigslist.

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The official title of this set is “Anniversary Orgy Party” but it should just be called “Party”. Who doesn’t have four Slovak models lezzing out in honor of their birthday? You? Maybe it just happens the moment you leave? Then again, you might just not be getting the invites? I don’t want to freak you out but let’s face it - this is evidence. This stuff is happening every day. Just not around you. Sad really.

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The only problem with cream as a sex-toy is that it goes off minutes after coming out of the can and leaves our you with a lover who smells like milk that’s been left in the sun. Bull semen is a far safer choice.

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Do you think Kyla’s a member of this club? Or is it easy to get permission for exhibitionism from the bar-manager/valet/pool-guy of anywhere if you turn up with a hot model who isn’t wearing underwear and intends to prove it? My guess is the later. Like American Express hot poontang is accepted worldwide.

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When you look at Kyla’s photographs for long enough you start to notice she dyes her hair darker than it’s natural mid brown, her right breast hangs lower than her left one and when she spreads her labia her eyes close automatically.

What do you mean restraining order?

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I considered saying all these pieces of evidence of our mutual Chinese future has a name that’d do well for a Panda. Then I realized that was racist. So I’ll just say these ladies are vely, vely roverry. Racism avoided.

Something you don’t know. When they shoot hardcore photos the good photographers don’t just shoot the performers posing, they just direct them having sex and use flash-guns to freeze the action. It’s hard to believe when you see the results but you are in fact seeing what you think they’re faking.

This set is not one of those occasions.

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There’s nothing about stripper shoes and purple tights which is right but damn, it’s working for Kyla. There’s nothing more I can say about this which doesn’t end up with me posting a photo of my penis on Craigslist and we all know how that ended last time.

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These aren’t outtakes from the photoset by J. Stephen Hicks which made Kyla famous (the one with sand on her bum), but that’s no reason not to imagine what it’s like to be a sand person who calls Kyla’s crack their home.

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It’s very hard to make anything involving a naked Kyla Cole come over with all the sex appeal of clip-art but this manages it. I guess she was trying to promote her appearance on the cover of Penthouse. I get it. Now please never do this again.

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I know these pictures are almost identical but it’s an angle you never get tired of.

Model + Beer+ Digital Camera = Porn

Any questions?

N.B. This is particularly rare for featuring Kyla with a trimmed bush. She did the whole ‘heart’ thing. Must have been love. Sweet really.

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Why is Erica trapped in a pink corner? It’s as if she tried to run away from the photographer but got stuck and decided to go through with the shoot anyway.

Who paints their walls pink anyway? It’s like being in the womb. A womb with Erica Campbell stripping in it. Shit. I’m typing drunk again aren’t I.

I love you guys. Seriously.

No I mean it.

Seriously.

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